VanDolls Video Game Burlesque Review
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Interview by: Chrisscreama
We recently sent the lovely Chriscreama to the VanDolls Burlesque show. Here is her review of the show, the girls and all the awesome you would find at a VanDolls production!
Photos by:Robyn Hanson
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The audience restlessly waited, as glimpses of flesh peered through the crack in the curtains. The VanDolls busily scattered to get ready. Once everything was together, we were presented cute clouds with lovely legs moving across the stage, this followed by an adorable opening…
Tetris! The opening was well choreographed, glittery, sexy and got the audience pumped for more! The mc of the night, was a rather entertaining and dirty computer voice who also gave a brief history of each game. The first act we were presented was Metroid.
Bunny Meugens, performed as Samus from Metriod. Her moves were robotic and hypnotic! She kicked off her boots and delicately removed her shoulder pads. She wore a lovely yellow corset and blue body suit, graceful and glittery, what a lovely bounty hunter she was!
For the second performance, Rufflesilkskin rocked the stage in her routine about DDR, that’s Dance Dance Revolution! This routine was a personal favorite of mine, it was very creative and adorable. She wore her hair in pigtails and you couldn’t help but notice her amazing hip movement. The routine was cute and clever and there were little signs saying “Miss” and “You Suck”, so she changed the song. The signs then changed to “Perfect”, “Good” and “Take it off!!!” And when she did “Take it off” she revealed her arrow bra and later arrow… bits!
Kitty Kitty Bang Bang sped on the stage as Sonic the Hedgehog, giving a very entertaining and silly routine! This VanDoll has a great smile and engaged the audience. The crowd went wild with excitement. She was seductive with her coins, her outfit was cute and there were BOOBS under that fur!!
So the next VanDoll “What's Her Name?” snuck on stage as Spyro, a very silly and bratty purple dragon. I think our audience wished they were the crystals, even if they were tossed aside, they still got an awful lot of attention. I bet you didn’t know Spyro had nice boobs? Well she even tasseled them for us. Poor Spyro was a bit impressionable though, she left the stage with puff the magic dragon?
Scarlet Delirium went post-apocalyptic in her Fallout routine, featuring a kiddie pool and glowing Nuka Cola. She had good balance and nice legs. She consistently went after her pipe and gestured at the audience if she should go in the pool, naturally we said yes, we wanted her wet!
A Pac-Man group routine hit up the stage next. Sexy ghosts, with sexy legs, and a lovely Miss Pac-Man in a long yellow dress. Miss Pac-Man popped little balloons resembling the classic yummy little dots, turning those pesky ghosts blue and less clothed, but they sought out their revenge by stripping her.
The VanDolls came together again this time giving us Zelda! Link goes through great measures to save his beloved Zelda, tons of epic running and rolling to classic Zelda music and killing a nasty spider that was hiding in the curtains. Their routine was an homage to the game, with a cute squeaky faerie, a dancing shop keeper and Link's classic “giving head” open mouth expression. Link tried to seduce Zelda by pulling her clothes off, but failed, and Epona kidnapped and humped Zelda! And she seemed to like it? Poor Link.
Sweet Sashay as Lara Croft from Tomb Raider rolls on stage, where there is a bathroom set up. This routine was incredibly hot, sassy and entertaining. Another favorite of mine, outstanding! Classical music plays as the lovely Lara croft removes her coat and places it on the chair, she slowly takes of her gloves, such a tease. Then a pesky villain interrupts. The music switches to “Where's your head at”, the bad guy attacks, but naturally Lara wins buy kicking him off. The music returns to normal, she resumes seducing us. She puts her gun on the table and dances rather whimsical, she removes her belt, placing it on the chair, shows of her bum, and asks for cheers, we complied. Two more naughty villains then arrive, the music switching back to “Where's your head at”. But she’s prepared, she has boob guns! Be gone pesky villains! The music returns to normal, she removes her bra, boots and so forth, with a very sexy dance on her chair, then slowly and gracefully heads to the bath, then Link (Zelda) appears, she shoots link and then blows us a kiss! Not even Link can stop Lara Croft!!
Malvina MasVino pushes The Weighted Companion Cube on stage for her Portal routine! The cube dances around flashing long sexy legs, leaving scientist Malvina a bit baffled. I couldn’t help but notice the cake on the left side of the stage. The cube transforms into a lovely robot girl and they dance. The robot strips the scientist, space, space, strip, space! They were a very good team, the scientist strips the robot and they play with her wrappings and then fall over, the robot landing with her pretty face in the cake. Did I say cake? The cake was a lie…
Ah yes, Velvet Von Doff’s Tron routine, it was amazing! Her and her partner moved as one. It was glow in the dark and had the audience uber excited, they clapped to the beat of “Danger! High Voltage”. The two performers did a very sexy yet hilarious dance off. Bending each other over and throwing each other around. We all seemed to get a kick out of Velvet’s glowing breasts. The two brawled over the disc, Velvet won the battle, killed her partner and did a victory dance with her tasseled boobs!
And it all ends with Mario, I can’t think of a better way to end a videogame burlesque. A very cute group routine, proving that Princess Peach is clearly in another castle, even Donkey Kong had his way with her! There were super cute costumesa and super cute pasties. They stripped Peach down to her mushrooms, and Mario down to her mustache pasties. It all ended with tons of sound bits from the game making a super entertaining finish to an overall amazing show. Thanks again VanDolls! That's all geeks, Game over!
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Feb 15 2012